Friday, April 4, 2014


And I'm not nearly as articulate as Samantha. From Defeating the Dragons. These three seem to me to go together. Roses-how the purity culture taught me to be abused.  Then there's a two parter. Why purity culture doesn't teach consent 1 and 2. Which leads us to an abstinence based sex ed program in Mississippi that's straight out of the "purity" handbook. Read the title of the Rawstory story and weep. Mississippi sex education program compares teen girls to 'dirty' Peppermint Patties.  At least if they have sex before they're married. And it doesn't have to be intercourse, they include any kind sexual contact.

This lady is fantastic. Please spend some time with her entries and especially the comments from other women who have escaped and survived the so called Christian Purity Culture. Understanding a little where these folks are coming from explains at lot about the “culture wars.”

And that brings me to a place I never imagined I’d be. A couple of places actually. Although I’ve been tap dancing on the line for years that line is getting closer and closer to my feet. I’ve hung onto the Quaker side of the puzzle because frankly, Quakers like Unitarians aren’t exactly conventional “Christians.” But that word Christian is loaded down with more baggage than Marley’s ghost and I’m not sure we can reclaim it. At least not until the whole rotten business has collapsed and burned. Then maybe we can salvage something from the wreck. 

Second. It looks like it’s past time for a national examination of those who claim to be Christians. (sidebar, this is true for other faiths as well, especially Islam) Are you following Christ or is this a smoke screen that excuses a culture that abuses half the human race from the time they're born. What else can I believe when a woman is slowly seduced into an abusive relationship. When she finally says “enough” she risks her “partner” going public. Even though she was doing what he wanted, often coerced her into doing under the threat of exposure she’s labeled a slut, a whore, damaged goods that can’t be salvaged and he may just get a free ride. Because he's a man and he really couldn't control himself. 

And what does this culture say about men? That they're totally sexaholics who can't control themselves? Or is it an excuse to abuse with what just might amount to a get out of jail free card. At least within the congregation. Goes a long way to explain the "if you were really raped you won't get pregnant" comments a couple of years ago. 

1 comment:

flask said...

jackie, i used to be all christian and everything and the end of it for me was the point at which i was thrown out of my church in the aftermath of what happened when i was sexually assaulted by my best friend's husband.

it was a liberal mainstream protestant church, and open and affirming reconciling church.

we are blamed for our own sexuality and we are blamed for other people;s sexuality. we are blamed for our own povaerty, we are blamed and shamed and coerced until there is nothing left.

i have started to think there simply is no god.

there's too much bad shit that goes on in the name of some imaginary friend.

it makes me sad.